MY COUNTRY POLITICS (NO ONE DOES IT BETTER)

Oya, let's begin... 🤭😄

Like every job or should I say "profession", you need a guiding principle and the right act to make you go far in your career in tht particular field. My country politics is no difference, just think of it as a comedic telenovela, because if you follow my country politics properly and with a open mind, two things are guaranteed; 1. You'll never have hypertension and 2. You'll enjoy the cruise 🤣🤭😄. 

Being a politician in my country to a very large extent, is a full time job. I mean think of it na; how can someone know he can make that much money and still want to do something else? Once heard, my country Senators are the highest paid in the world. I don't know how true that is tho, but it should be true, imagine those people collecting "hardship allowance", like tf! Which hardship? 🙄😄😆. 

Without digressing, to stay relevant in my country politics, you need to serve the people contents (at least na why we dey watch bbnaija sef be that 😄). The rule is simple; no content, no fan/supporters. That's why my country politics is not for the saints, but the creatives😉. 

If you're still confused about what this guy is talking about, let me highlight some for you.

The number 1 requirement for being a politician anywhere in the world, is a good ability to lie (maybe my country politicians are just way too good with that tho 😄😉). Omo! Politicians dey lie mehn. Forgerrit, if you no fit lie, you no dey win anything, if you enter anywhere, na your toilet o 😄😄😄. You see in my country ehn, our politicians are just natural in this field. I'm not saying they are liars o, but you know, just natural (make person no come beat me😒🙄🤭). Sheybi. Sheybi you remember someone once told us in 2015 that we'll have stable electricity by 2018. Well, I don't know about your own area o, but na 26hours a day we dey get light for my side, dem never take am before😎🤭.

On average, almost all my country politicians have PhD in dramatic art. I know you know too, but let me tell you some if the ones that fascinates me; 

• ability to cry on national TV

• jumping out of a moving vehicle

• be a politician cum singer

• fighting on national TV

• faking fainting to avoid question

Something dey tell me say e don do, oya fill the rest yourself🤭🤭🤭

 

Okay, na too much grammar be that abi? The layman word is simply; have the ability to choose what you want to remember and forget (not forget forget, but atleast be able to tell people you can't remember). That's a bigger skill than just knowing how to lie o 🤣🤣🤣😆. Sheybi you  remember that time that uncle said he will never contest for any election again, abi that time dem talk say dem go dey give us salary as youth every month (omo, I still need that money o). well, kashamadupe 🙄😒😄.

Hey siri, play me any song by a Chinese gospel artist.

Let me go and eat jeje, before ulcer waya me 🚶🚶🚶🚶